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Dhoni for gradual phasing out of seniors

2012-01-15T22:57:00.002-08:00

Australia v India, 3rd Test, Perth, 3rd day

Dhoni for gradual phasing out of seniors

Sidharth Monga at the WACA

January 15, 2012

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MS Dhoni wants India's senior batsmen, including VVS Laxman, to be phased out thoughtfully © Getty Images

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News : A collective failure, says chief selector Srikkanth

News : I am the main culprit - Dhoni

Players/Officials: MS Dhoni | Rahul Dravid | VVS Laxman |Sachin Tendulkar

Matches: Australia v India at Perth

Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

Teams: India

MS Dhoni has said he is not aware of any ultimatum the BCCI might have given to VVS Laxman after the batsman's lean series in England and Australia. It was reported in some Indian newspapers, quoting BCCI officials, that Laxman might have played his last Test in Perth. "As of now there is nothing like that that I know of officially," Dhoni said when asked about the development.

When asked if he would try to talk him out of it if Laxman indeed decided to call it quits, Dhoni said: "I won't like to answer something where there is a big if and big but. I don't know where this came from, but unless Laxman comes and tells me I don't know whether it's happening or not happening. I really don't have to think about it [now]."

Dhoni, however, spoke about the importance of phasing out the seniors thoughtfully. He said he hadn't sat and thought about it, but the end of the series might be a good time to start. "Not really right now," he said. "May be at the end of the series will be a right time. We also have to see what the senior's thoughts are. I think there is a bit more emphasis right now about getting rid of the seniors but it will be a very careful decision. Because of what they have done for the country, and the amount of experience they can share with the youngsters."

Dhoni spoke of getting a right combination of youth and experience. "Very important to have the right mixture at the right time," he said. "You can't have all the seniors missing out all of a sudden, and all the juniors coming in. We will have to thoughtfully decide the best option. Give a bit of exposure to youngsters coming [in], at the same time have the fair mix of experienced guys and youngsters.

"Ultimately [in] Test cricket a lot of people will be tested, but once they transfer that experience or share that experience, the job of the youngsters will become slightly easy. That's something we need to be very careful about."

There has been widespread criticism that India have already delayed the phasing out of their three great batting stars. There have been calls to lose with young players if they have to keep losing, like they have done over the last seven overseas Tests. The Adelaide Test will be India's last away from home over the next two years. "Ultimately we know that most of our batsmen who will come in or will be part of the team will perform in India because we have played in India," Dhoni said. "But we need to find ways as to how we perform outside India. Definitely it will be a good option to see the youngsters coming in. Of course we are playing quite a few games in India, but we are playing tough opposition at the same time. I think it will be a good exposure for them."

Dhoni was asked if the Indian set-up lacked the courage to drop legends of the game when they were out of form. "It's not about courage," he said. "It's about taking the right decision. Just for example, if you see in this series, people went after Virat [Kohli] to be dropped, and he batted really well in this series. You have to give that span of time to people. Especially when you know somebody is a really talented guy, you have to give that extra time to that particular batsman to keep going on."

Dhoni was also asked how he would like to see the transition happen. "I have not sat and thought over it," he said. "It's something everybody needs to be a part of. The players and the BCCI also. It will be a process rather than just an event. We will be carefully deciding as to what needs to be done in the best interest of the country."

Tendulkar back in ODI squad

2012-01-15T22:57:00.001-08:00

India in Australia 2011-12

Tendulkar back in ODI squad

ESPNcricinfo staff

January 15, 2012

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Sachin Tendulkar has not played an ODI since the World Cup final © AFP

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News : Tendulkar likely to play in Australia ODIs

Players/Officials: Praveen Kumar | Sachin Tendulkar

Series/Tournaments: Commonwealth Bank Series | India tour of Australia

Teams: India

Sachin Tendulkar has been picked in India's limited-overs squad for the first time since the World Cup. He will stay on after the Test series in Australia for the one-day tri-series that also features Sri Lanka. Praveen Kumar, the India medium-pacer who missed the Tests due to a fractured rib, is also a part of the 17-man limited-overs squad. India will play two Twenty20 internationals in Australia followed by the ODI tri-series, which will be played from February 5 to March 8.

The rest of the limited-overs squad is similar to the one that was picked for the fourth and fifth ODIs against West Indies at home in December last year. Irfan Pathan, who played his first international for India in more than two years during that series, has retained his place in the squad. Zaheer Khan, who like Tendulkar has not played an ODI since the World Cup final, will also stay on for the limited-over games. Umesh Yadav and R Vinay Kumar make up the rest of the fast-bowling department.

Rahul Sharma, the legspinner who impressed during the series against West Indies, has been selected as the second spinner alongside R Ashwin. Manoj Tiwary scored his maiden ODI hundred in the fifth ODI against West Indies and is part of the squad again, which means there is no place for Ajinkya Rahane, who was part of the Test squad. Parthiv Patel has been picked as the reserve wicketkeeper despite his poor run with the bat in recent ODIs. Ravindra Jadeja, who has occupied the allrounder's spot in the limited-overs side since the one-day leg of the tour of England, has also been selected.

Yuvraj Singh's time away from cricket continues as he has not yet fully recovered from the non-malignant lung tumour that has kept him out of the team since the home ODIs against West Indies.

Squad: MS Dhoni (capt & wk), Virender Sehwag, Gautam Gambhir, Sachin Tendulkar, Suresh Raina, Virat Kohli, Rohit Sharma, Ravindra Jadeja, Manoj Tiwary, Parthiv Patel (wk), Zaheer Khan, Umesh Yadav, Irfan Pathan, R Vinay Kumar, Praveen Kumar, Rahul Sharma, R Ashwin

Australia demolish India by an innings to go up 3-0

2012-01-15T22:55:00.000-08:00

Australia v India, 3rd Test, Perth, 3rd day

Australia demolish India by an innings to go up 3-0

The Report by Daniel Brettig

January 15, 2012

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Australia 369 (Warner 180, Yadav 5-93) beat India 161 (Kohli 44, Hilfenhaus 4-43) and 171 (Kohli 75, Hilfenhaus 4-54) by an innings and 37 runs
Scorecard and ball-by-ball details

Ben Hilfenhaus claimed four wickets in each innings© Getty Images

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Matches: Australia v India at Perth

Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

Teams: Australia | India

Australia's fast bowlers completed an innings-and-37-run destruction of India minutes after lunch on day three of the third Test, snatching the Border-Gavaskar Trophy in the most emphatic style imaginable. Ryan Harris split a stubborn stand between Virat Kohli and Rahul Dravid before Peter Siddle nicked out MS Dhoni in the shadows of the interval, and Ben Hilfenhaus razed the tail with three wickets in five balls on resumption.

Siddle found Kohli's outside edge to complete proceedings, heralding the start of rich celebrations for the hosts following victory over opponents who never came to terms with the challenges posed by Australia's bowlers and conditions. The performance of the match was by a home batsman however, and it was a measure of the Man-of-the-Match David Warner's 180 that India's batsmen fell short of his individual tally in each innings.

His efforts gave the pace ensemble a chance to squeeze India, and all the bowlers contributed in another strikingly even performance. Harris will bowl far worse and claim five wickets rather than the one he plucked in the second innings, while Siddle and Hilfenhaus maintained their outstanding marriage of pressure and late movement. Mitchell Starc, of course, had made two critical breaks on the second evening.

Dravid and Kohli provided the staunchest Indian batting resistance of the match in a union of 84, but were never completely in control against Harris, who deservedly found a way past Dravid towards the end of an exacting spell. Siddle's dismissal of Dhoni was a familiar sight, the captain's edge snapped up by Ricky Ponting in the cordon.

Kohli's innings was a beacon of hope for India's future, demonstrating strong technique and a stronger mind to cope with Australia's bowling that did not flag in considerable heat. Following up a similarly composed 44 in the first innings, it may warrant a promotion in the batting order for Adelaide.

Resuming at 4 for 88, still 120 short of going into credit, Dravid and Kohli had plenty of testing moments in the opening overs. Harris' first two deliveries of the day did everything but bowl Dravid, angling in and seaming away, while at the other end Hilfenhaus swung the ball tantalisingly away with the help of a south-westerly breeze.

Kohli was the more assured of the batting duo, collecting his runs quietly with ones and twos, reining in his most aggressive tendencies in a struggle for survival against bowling that offered precious little latitude.

Harris, in particular, posed question after question, taking advantage of a crack on a length at the Lillee-Marsh Stand end to bring the ball sharply back into Kohli and Dravid. Dravid was late to react to some subtle inswing, the ball swerving between bat and pad to send leg stump cartwheeling. Dravid shuffled off, bowled five times in six innings during the series.

Dhoni's technique has been found similarly wanting, and once again he would edge tamely into the cordon. Siddle's delivery was full, fast and swinging, and Ponting's hands at second slip were alert and safe. Nevertheless, the dismissal was another grim reflection on the batting of Dhoni, who has always struggled to replicate his subcontinental run-scoring on foreign shores.

Lunch came and went, Kohli still harbouring the desire to reach a century. But Hilfenhaus was not in a mood to countenance charity. Bashing the ball in short of a length, he had Vinay Kumar and Zaheer Khan fencing to Michael Clarke at slip in consecutive balls, and while Ishant Sharma survived the hat-trick delivery, he fended his third straight to Ed Cowan at short leg.

Umesh Yadav survived one ball to give Kohli the strike, but Siddle probed the perfect line and length once more to coax a touch behind and seal a series that has been more lopsided than anyone can have imagined.

Warner no shooting star

2012-01-15T22:53:00.000-08:00

Warner no shooting star

Brydon Coverdale

January 16, 2012

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David Warner wants more days like this © Getty Images

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Ian Chappell : Warner's Twenty20 Test ininngs

Matches: Australia v India at Perth

Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

Teams: Australia | India

David Warner has won two Man of the Match awards from his first five Tests, but he still craves greater consistency as Australia's opener in the long format. Warner's 180 at the WACA was easily the standout performance on a pitch that proved difficult for the batsmen, and more than any other player he was responsible for Australia's innings victory.

In Hobart last month, Warner was a controversial selection as Man of the Match as the award was voted for by Channel Nine viewers, despite the fact that Doug Bracewell had bowled New Zealand to a historic victory and was regarded by most experts as clearly the best afield. There was no question about Warner's award on this occasion, although a case could have been mounted for Ben Hilfenhaus, who took eight wickets.

Two centuries from his first five Tests is a promising start, but Warner is also aware that as Test batsman, the gaps between his best and worst cannot be allowed to grow too much. So far in his Test career, Warner has posted scores of 3, 12 not out, 15, 123 not out, 37, 5, 8 and 180.

"I've always said I'd like to be more consistent in all three forms that I'm playing," Warner said. "You might get runs today and miss out in the next game but that's cricket. I'll keep working hard and backing myself. Hopefully this wasn't a one-off thing. It was my second Test hundred. I showed that I can play maturely as well in difficult situations [in Hobart]. Hopefully I can keep continuing with my form."

Warner has come a long way from the man who burst on to the international scene as a Twenty20 specialist with a brutal 89 against South Africa three years ago, before he had even made his first-class debut. By the end of last summer, Warner had played only seven Sheffield Shield matches and found it hard to force his way into the New South Wales line-up.

"The frustration was always there, with New South Wales not giving me an opportunity," he said. "But at the end of the day there were blokes ahead of me and I had to go out and score runs in grade cricket and 2nd XI cricket and make my way into the team.

"The only way to do that was weight of runs. Fortunately I did that and now I'm in a good headspace. I'm really enjoying my cricket at the moment. Being part of the Test team, we're going fantastic at the moment and I couldn't be any happier."

His progression has impressed the Test captain Michael Clarke, who is also one of the selectors who gave Warner a chance in the baggy green. Clarke believes Warner's career should highlight to every young cricketer that Twenty20 is not the only option.

"To see a kid who everybody thought was just a Twenty20 player 12 months ago walk out and bat exactly the same, but wearing the baggy green, playing in his whites ... I've said to Davey for a long time now there's no reason he can't have success in any form of the game, with the amount of talent he's got," Clarke said. "It shows young kids out there today that whether it's Twenty20 cricket, one-day cricket or Test cricket, if you can play one form, you can play all three forms. That's really exciting for the game."

Over the past three Tests, Warner has been partnered at the top of the order by a much more understated opener, Ed Cowan. Their styles complement each other and at the WACA, that paid off as they put on 214 for the first wicket, just the second double-century opening stand for Australia since the end of the Hayden-Langer era.

Warner's 180 and Cowan's 74 were both their best Test scores, the first time since the Trent Bridge Ashes Test of 1989 that both Australian openers had bettered their highest Test scores in the same innings. Warner said working with Cowan was a pleasure.

"I think it's great," he said. "We're gelling together. As people have said, we're an odd couple. But when we're out there, we keep each other going. We're always talking to each other every ball. I know Ed's game, I know where his release shots are to get off strike when difficult periods are happening.

"It's the same with me. When he thinks I'm playing too loose, he'll come down to me and keep a check and say you've got to keep playing straight. I respect that. I'll always listen to my partner. Hopefully we can keep continuing this."

Australia v India / India Test Squad -Border-Gavaskar Trophy, 2011/12

2011-12-24T06:10:00.001-08:00

Border-Gavaskar Trophy, 2011/12

December 9, 2011

MS Dhoni

captain/keeper

Age: 30 years 155 days

Playing role: Wicketkeeper batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Virender Sehwag

vice-captain

Age: 33 years 50 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Ravichandran Ashwin

Age: 25 years 83 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Rahul Dravid

Age: 38 years 332 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Gautam Gambhir

Age: 30 years 56 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Legbreak

Zaheer Khan

Age: 33 years 63 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Left-arm fast-medium

Notes: Subject to fitness

Virat Kohli

Age: 23 years 34 days

Playing role: Middle-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

VVS Laxman

Age: 37 years 38 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Abhimanyu Mithun

Age: 22 years 45 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Pragyan Ojha

Age: 25 years 95 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Slow left-arm orthodox

Ajinkya Rahane

Age: 23 years 187 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Wriddhiman Saha

wicketkeeper

Age: 27 years 46 days

Playing role: Wicketkeeper

Batting: Right-hand bat

Ishant Sharma

Age: 23 years 98 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm fast-medium

Rohit Sharma

Age: 24 years 223 days

Playing role: Batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Sachin Tendulkar

Age: 38 years 229 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Vinay Kumar

Age: 27 years 300 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Umesh Yadav

Age: 24 years 45 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm fast-medium

Varun Aaron

withdrawn player

Age: 22 years 41 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium-fast

Praveen Kumar

withdrawn player

Age: 25 years 68 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Australia v India / Australia Squad - 1st Test -2011/12

2011-12-24T06:09:00.000-08:00

1st Test: Australia v India at Melbourne, Dec 26-30, 2011

December 21, 2011

Michael Clarke

captain

Age: 30 years 263 days

Playing role: Middle-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Slow left-arm orthodox

Brad Haddin

vice-captain/keeper

Age: 34 years 59 days

Playing role: Wicketkeeper batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Daniel Christian

Age: 28 years 231 days

Playing role: Allrounder

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm fast-medium

Ed Cowan

Age: 29 years 188 days

Playing role: Opening batsman

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Legbreak

Ben Hilfenhaus

Age: 28 years 281 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm fast-medium

Michael Hussey

Age: 36 years 208 days

Playing role: Middle-order batsman

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Nathan Lyon

Age: 24 years 31 days

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm offbreak

Shaun Marsh

Age: 28 years 165 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Slow left-arm orthodox

James Pattinson

Age: 21 years 232 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm fast-medium

Ricky Ponting

Age: 37 years 2 days

Playing role: Top-order batsman

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm medium

Peter Siddle

Age: 27 years 26 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Right-hand bat

Bowling: Right-arm fast-medium

Mitchell Starc

Age: 21 years 325 days

Playing role: Bowler

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Left-arm fast-medium

David Warner

Age: 25 years 55 days

Playing role: Opening batsman

Batting: Left-hand bat

Bowling: Legbreak

India tour of Australia, 2011/12 / Fixtures

2011-12-24T06:08:00.000-08:00

Date and Time	Match	Weather

Thu Dec 15 - Fri Dec 16 00:00 GMT \| 11:00 local 05:30 IST	Cricket Australia Chairman's XI v Indians Manuka Oval, Canberra	N/A

Mon Dec 19 - Wed Dec 21 00:00 GMT \| 11:00 local 05:30 IST	Cricket Australia Chairman's XI v Indians Manuka Oval, Canberra	N/A

Mon Dec 26 - Fri Dec 30 23:30 GMT (prev day) \| 10:30 local 05:00 IST	1st Test - Australia v India Melbourne Cricket Ground	17 - 27° C

Tue Jan 3 - Sat Jan 7 23:30 GMT (prev day) \| 10:30 local 05:00 IST	2nd Test - Australia v India Sydney Cricket Ground	N/A

Fri Jan 13 - Tue Jan 17 02:30 GMT \| 10:30 local 08:00 IST	3rd Test - Australia v India Western Australia Cricket Association Ground, Perth	N/A

Tue Jan 24 - Sat Jan 28 00:00 GMT \| 10:30 local 05:30 IST	4th Test - Australia v India Adelaide Oval	N/A

Wed Feb 1 08:35 GMT \| 19:35 local 14:05 IST	1st T20I - Australia v India Stadium Australia, Sydney	N/A

Fri Feb 3 08:35 GMT \| 19:35 local 14:05 IST	2nd T20I - Australia v India Melbourne Cricket Ground	N/A

Sun Feb 5 03:20 GMT \| 14:20 local 08:50 IST	Australia v India Melbourne Cricket Ground	N/A

Wed Feb 8 04:20 GMT \| 12:20 local 09:50 IST	India v Sri Lanka Western Australia Cricket Association Ground, Perth	N/A

Sun Feb 12 03:20 GMT \| 13:50 local 08:50 IST	Australia v India Adelaide Oval	N/A

Tue Feb 14 03:20 GMT \| 13:50 local 08:50 IST	India v Sri Lanka Adelaide Oval	N/A

Sun Feb 19 03:20 GMT \| 13:20 local 08:50 IST	Australia v India Brisbane Cricket Ground, Woolloongabba, Brisbane	N/A

Tue Feb 21 03:20 GMT \| 13:20 local 08:50 IST	India v Sri Lanka Brisbane Cricket Ground, Woolloongabba, Brisbane	N/A

Sun Feb 26 03:20 GMT \| 14:20 local 08:50 IST	Australia v India Sydney Cricket Ground	N/A

Tue Feb 28 03:20 GMT \| 14:20 local 08:50 IST	India v Sri Lanka Bellerive Oval, Hobart	N/A

No responsibility is taken by ESPNcricinfo for the accuracy of this information. Weather forecast has been displayed for the next 10 days. Weather powered by

India's quicks' fitness key to series - Warne -India in Australia 2011-12

2011-12-24T06:07:00.001-08:00

India in Australia 2011-12

India's quicks' fitness key to series - Warne

Brydon Coverdale

December 22, 2011

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Ishant Sharma: "I think it's going to come down to how India are going to take 20 wickets with their bowling."© Getty Images

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Harsha Bhogle : Can India seize their chance to win in Australia?

Players/Officials: Mark Taylor | Shane Warne

Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

Teams: Australia | India

Shane Warne believes India's chances in the upcoming Test series in Australia will hinge on the fitness of fast bowlers Ishant Sharma and Zaheer Khan. Both men have had ankle problems in recent times and Warne believes a lack of depth in India's attack could be exposed if Ishant and Zaheer are not at full fitness for the series, which begins at the MCG on December 26.

Ishant was bothered by a dodgy ankle during the first of the two tour games in Canberra last week, and he bowled only four overs in the second match, on the final day. Zaheer is coming back from surgery on his ankle; he did not play in the first match and then sent down 15 overs in the second game. Neither man has yet taken a wicket on the tour.

"India has a quality team, as they've been showing in recent times," Warne said. "In Test cricket we've seen them, against West Indies, do well. But before that they played England in England and got beaten 4-0 with a swinging ball and a good English seam attack. Their batsmen will do pretty well.

"Their bowlers will have to stay fit. If Zaheer Khan or Ishant Sharma get injured, then I think their bowling attack could be quite weak. The Australian batsmen could perform pretty well. I think it's going to come down to how India are going to take 20 wickets with their bowling.

"I think their batters, especially Rahul Dravid, will make big runs. He's a quality person, he's a quality act, he's a quality player. Hopefully Sachin [Tendulkar] will get his hundredth hundred here. It would be a great time to do it here at the MCG in front of 70 or 80,000."

Warne was speaking outside the MCG at the unveiling of a bronze statue of him in his legspinning stride, the first in a series to be known as the Avenue of Legends. His former captain Mark Taylor was also at the ceremony but, unlike Warne, he was less certain that India's outstanding batting line-up would thrive this summer against an attack led by James Pattinson and Peter Siddle.

"They've been great players," Taylor said. "I'll be interested to see, though, how they'll go against this young Australian bowling line-up, because I don't feel that Sachin, Rahul and VVS [Laxman] are getting tested as often as say Ricky Ponting and Mike Hussey have in recent times.

"They have been tested on wickets that have been more bowler-friendly, whereas Sachin and Rahul and VVS play a lot of their cricket in India, where the wickets are generally flatter and don't bounce as much, don't move off the seam. This will be a really good test for them, and a good test for our fast bowlers. I reckon they [Australia's bowlers] are up to it. I think that's going to be one of the highlights of the summer, to see how those ageing batsmen from India go against the young quicks."

Tendulkar, Dravid and Laxman are all older than Ponting, who has struggled for form over the past two years and has not made a Test century since January 2010. Taylor endured a similar slump in the later years of his career, but even his longest stretch without a Test hundred was only 24 innings; Ponting's has now ballooned to 31.

"He's probably in a similar boat to where I was, and I think Steve Waugh had the same problem getting towards the end of your career," Taylor said. "It's not that you can't do it anymore. You just need a moment where a lucky break goes your way or you just play a shot where you think, there it is, and Ricky is probably that close. Boxing Day has generally been pretty good to him … hopefully, over the five days here, we'll see the real Ricky Ponting."

Brydon Coverdale is an assistant editor at ESPNcricinfo

Hilfenhaus not so predictable this time -India in Australia 2011-12

2011-12-24T06:06:00.000-08:00

India in Australia 2011-12

Hilfenhaus not so predictable this time

Daniel Brettig

December 22, 2011

Comments: 41 | Login via | Text size: A | A

Ben Hilfenhaus has picked himself up after being floored during last summer's Ashes series © Getty Images

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News : Cowan, Marsh, Hilfenhaus named for Boxing Day

News : Hilfenhaus spell leads Hurricanes to victory

Players/Officials: George Bailey | Ben Hilfenhaus

Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

Teams: Australia | India | Tasmania

Ben Hilfenhaus has lifted himself out of the rut of predictability that made him look so innocuous during the Ashes last summer, and will be a far more versatile performer should he bowl against India's batsmen on Boxing Day.

So says Hilfenhaus' state captain, George Bailey, who was frank in his assessments and advice to the Tasmanian swing bowler on his return to Sheffield Shield ranks after Alastair Cook and others in the England batting line-up had so humbled his methods.

Under the guidance of Bailey and the Tigers' bowling coach Ali de Winter, 28-year-old Hilfenhaus has endeavoured to use a wider range of angles on the bowling crease this summer, a favoured tactic of skilful bowlers for more than a century. He is also striving for a fuller length.

"Hilfy last year had become quite predictable," Bailey told ESPNcricinfo. "He could replicate the same ball over and over but at Test cricket, once players were in he found it hard to actually break through and get a wicket.

"So aside from getting over some niggling injuries, which he's carried for quite some time - he's certainly bowling a bit quicker and is a bit stronger this year - is just a bit more variety at the crease, being able to bowl wider of the stumps, and bowl different balls rather than just the outswinger."

The adjustment of Hilfenhaus' approach has not been an entirely seamless process, for his dependable, uncomplicated character does not always take readily to change. Bailey said Hilfenhaus had needed to see results in his new methods before he committed to them fully. He also had to return his bowling action to the full-bodied style that first earned him a Test spot, rather than the self-protecting adjustments he had made to alleviate the pain of knee tendinitis, to the detriment of his pace and swing.

"He's certainly trying to come from different areas [on the crease] a bit more, Bailey said. "He's also had a bit of trouble with knee tendinitis, and I don't think he did it consciously but he just slightly adjusted his action and was bowling around his front knee a bit more. And he does bowl from quite close to the stumps, so if he was swinging it, it was swinging a little early, rather than coming a little wider of the crease and angling in at the stumps before taking it away.

"Hilfy is someone who needs to see the results before he believes something, but there is no doubt I think if he can learn to use the crease a bit more, come from wider and angle in before taking it away, he will not need to swing it as much as he thinks he needs to.

"He's certainly done that for periods, he's starting to bowl a better length that suits him, giving him the chance to move the ball, because he has got a skill that not a great deal of bowlers in Australia have in terms of being able to swing the ball at pretty good pace. He's still working on those things and working pretty hard."

Bailey sensed a certain impatience about Hilfenhaus last summer, as his hard-won place in the Test team was slipping away from him. Seeking a startling bag of wickets to re-assert himself, he may have lost sight of the patience and persistence that gave him a baggy green cap in the first place.

"We've challenged him a bit this year at Tassie to bowl into the wind a bit more, rather than being a strike bowler all the time," Bailey said. "Whether Hilf felt it or not, I felt at times he felt his way back in was to take a big bag of wickets and so he was bowling to try to take wickets every ball, whereas this year he's been a bit more patient and willing to do the roles.

"If he's taking wickets that's fine, if he's not then he can tie up an end and help Luke [Butterworth] or James [Faulkner] or Xavier [Doherty] take wickets. He's just got back to enjoying his cricket a bit more and working hard for the team while providing a bit more variation. I'd still like to see him bowling a little fuller, but that's something we'll keep discussing when he gets the chance to play for Tassie.



	"Hilfy is someone who needs to see the results before he believes something, but there is no doubt I think if he can learn to use the crease a bit more, come from wider and angle in before taking it away, he will not need to swing it as much as he thinks he needs to."George Bailey on Ben Hilfenhaus

"No doubt when he's at his best he's in Australia's best handful of fast bowlers. Looking at the Test series coming up and where they're going to be in their focus, being in England in 2013, I still think he's got a big part to play. It is good to see he's back in the mix."

Hilfenhaus returns to an Australian pace battery that is now singing from the simple hymn sheet of Craig McDermott, who has stressed the importance of bowling a full length to draw batsmen into drives and edges, even if a few more runs may accrue. Bailey said the method was neither new nor complicated, but could certainly be effective.

"It's not new information there, I think Greg Chappell before him was big on that, if you talk to Glenn McGrath and Jason Gillespie that's the length they bowled as well, I don't think it is rocket science in terms of a mantra," he said. "But that is the challenge, particularly as a young bowling group when you're playing against great batsmen and certainly some of these Indian players are.

"It can be pretty daunting to just keep throwing the ball up there full because you can get hurt a little bit on the scoreboard. The flipside is the rewards wickets-wise can be a lot greater, and it is as much about learning when you can go hard at that full length and when you need to restrict things and tie up an end."

Daniel Brettig is an assistant editor at ESPNcricinf

Hilfenhaus to play, Christian left out - Australia v India, 1st Test, Melbourne

2011-12-24T06:04:00.001-08:00

Australia v India, 1st Test, Melbourne

Hilfenhaus to play, Christian left out

Brydon Coverdale

December 24, 2011

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Players/Officials: Ed Cowan | Ben Hilfenhaus | Shaun Marsh

Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

Teams: Australia

Australia have decided against using the allrounder Daniel Christian in the Boxing Day Test, while the left-armer Mitchell Starc has also missed out from the 13-man squad. The captain Michael Clarke announced the starting line-up on Saturday, two days before the game, with Ben Hilfenhaus to play his first Test since the Ashes last summer.

Shaun Marsh was named at No.3 after making an impressive return from his back injury in Thursday night's Big Bash League match, while the opener Ed Cowan will make his debut. Ricky Ponting and Michael Hussey, the two under-pressure senior members of the middle order, have retained their positions.

The decision to go in with only four frontline bowlers could be viewed as a gamble against a strong batting line-up including Sachin Tendulkar, Rahul Dravid, Virender Sehwag and VVS Laxman. However, Clarke said he would call on his batsmen to provide some overs if required.

"I'm confident we've got the best XI to win this Test match in these conditions," Clarke said. "I can use Michael Hussey, Ricky Ponting and myself to bowl a few overs. David Warner can bowl a few legspinners. I feel we've got the right XI to give ourselves a chance of winning this Test match.

"DC [Christian] offers a lot with both bat and ball but unfortunately for him right now we can't fit him into the XI."

Hilfenhaus won his recall in part due to his ability to bowl long spells, which without an allrounder will become more important.

"I think it plays a part," Clarke said. "His control, he's a very good new ball bowler. He can bowl long spells. He's had success against India as well. There's a few reasons we decided to go with Hilfy."

While the bowling gains experience with the return of Hilfenhaus, the batting line-up will also welcome back an important man with Marsh to play his first Test since the Cape Town debacle last month. Clarke said he was confident Marsh was fit to play despite his serious back problems over the past six weeks.

"His back is fine," he said. "He's taken it easy yesterday and today to make sure he's fully recovered and ready to go come Boxing Day. I'd imagine you'll see Shaun out here tomorrow facing some bowlers or at least having some throwdowns. He's 100% ready to go."

Australia 1 David Warner, 2 Ed Cowan, 3 Shaun Marsh, 4 Ricky Ponting, 5 Michael Clarke (capt), 6 Michael Hussey, 7 Brad Haddin (wk), 8 Peter Siddle, 9 James Pattinson, 10 Nathan Lyon, 11 Ben Hilfenhaus.

Dhoni plays it cool - India in Australia 2011-12

2011-12-24T06:01:00.000-08:00

India in Australia 2011-12

Dhoni plays it cool

Press conferences with MS Dhoni are inevitably a cat-and-mouse game, as the India captain rarely gives anything away

Sidharth Monga

December 24, 2011

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Series/Tournaments: India tour of Australia

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MS Dhoni is a headline-writer's nightmare. He refuses to get drawn into any pre-series big talk, post-win boasting, or discussions about pressure. It's two days before the Boxing Day Test, the biggest event on Australia's cricket calendar, and you could sum up the state of mind he wants to project in one quote: "What's important is to live in the moment. You have to try to win more sessions than the opposition."

There have been comments from the opposition, players both current and retired, but he says, "We shall stick to what we need to do." Try asking if there is an extra significance to this series, coming as it does after the England debacle and in all likelihood being India's last away Tests for two years, and he says, "There is no point in taking extra pressure. We look to do well in every game, be it home or away. We look to keep it simple. Do small things well. We didn't do well in England of course but it's not about past or future. It's about the present."

Dhoni informs you that everyone is fit and available for selection, but immediately says there are two days to go and two days is a long time. Lest the headline uses the word "confident". Even the foreign journalists have stopped asking him about DRS, knowing they are not going to get anything new. Somebody asks him if the "favourites" tag means extra pressure, and he retorts, "Even when we were underdogs, you wanted us to be under pressure"

Dhoni is then asked about whether Ishant Sharma's decision to delay the surgery on his ankle was a wise move. "That depends on the individual and what the physio tells him regarding that," he says. Somebody else has spotted Gautam Gambhir and VVS Laxman making a few technical changes, and Dhoni's response to that is: "Very difficult for me to answer, because technically I am not very sound. Something that the coach does. One of these days I'll ask Duncan [Fletcher] to come for a press conference."

However, after about 15 minutes of this cat-and-mouse - and it's not really a criticism because he was not made captain to help sell papers - he does open up a bit, when asked about his own batting. Obviously in Tests, Dhoni the batsman is not the presence Dhoni the batsman is in shorter formats.

He has played important Test hands here and there, has scored quick hundreds when setting up a declaration, averages a respectable 38, but that defining big knock has eluded him. Last year he was on the verge of playing one such, trying to help India save the Centurion Test along with Sachin Tendulkar. During their partnership, batting seemed easy, and swiftly India threatened to erase the deficit. Just before a thunderstorm arrived, though, Dhoni got a corker from Dale Steyn, the kind of ball that, produced at the right time, is the difference between a draw and a win. It was 2010, but Dhoni mentioned the South Africa tour when talking of the year of the "80s".

"I don't think much about it," Dhoni said. "Of course as I said I am not technically very sound. At times for me it is about adapting to the conditions. Batting at No. 7, especially if you see this year, it hasn't been a brilliant year for me individually. I see this year as a year where I have scored a lot of these 80s. At times I have been short of partners, like for example, in South Africa I was batting decently, and [during] a couple of innings, all of a sudden I didn't have batsmen batting with me.

"[In these situations] You look to score as many runs as possible, and at times you get out. At the end of the day it looks like you haven't scored runs. Of course I would like to improve as an individual."

And while walking off, he jokes it was a very long press conference.

Sidharth Monga is an assistant editor at ESPNcricinfo

Top Ten Christmas Television Specials of All Time

2011-12-22T06:15:00.000-08:00

By Michael Harriot -- MMC Movie & Entertainment Guru

From the early days of television when The Hooneymoonerscelebrated Christmas in a live 40-minute sketch there has been a continual parade of made-for-television specials. Here are, without a doubt and surely without debate, the top ten:

1. Charlie Brown Christmas

Why it is #1: Charles Schulz beloved Peanuts Christmas special is one of if not THE most popular Christmas specials of all time. When this special was originally aired it was watched by over HALF the viewing television audience. Charlie Brown's Christmas is a mixture of Peanut comedy mixed with the classic and stirring message of Christmas. No one will ever forget this one simple phrase: “And that’s what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown”.

2. Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer

Why it is #2: Rudolph #2?!?! Blasphemy! The claymation-like Rankin Bass production of the Montgomery Ward's classic Christmas tale has consistently outsold other specials on recorded media for decades. How could it not be #1? Understand this special has one major flaw that can’t be ignored: just about everyone at the North Pole is a jerk. Think about it: Santa Claus? Not very nice to Rudolph. Elves? They bullied poor Elf Hermey to death. All the other reindeer? Won’t let Rudolph join in their reindeer games. What the heck? These guys make toys all year long for kids and then give them away on Christmas night and they can't accept two guys who are just a tad different? That’s not in the spirit of Christmas at all. Other than that gaping flaw this special is fantastic -- the innovative stop motion animation, classic songs and characters who have survived the test of time -- despite some of their flaws.

3. How the Grinch Stole Christmas

Why it is #3: WHY? How could it not be? It’s a special with Boris Karloff and the voice of Tony the Tiger for crying out loud! That alone is reason to put this special into any top ten. But its not just that. Chuck Jones brings a Dr. Seuss book to life. A wonderful story about a character who hates Christmas and the Who’s so much that he sets out to STEAL Christmas. That’s right, he’s taking it all, the ornaments, the food, even the TREE. He didn’t even leave a crumb big enough for a mouse. The message that Christmas is more than all that ranks it up there.

4. Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire

Why it is #4: While technically an episode of the Simpsons, this gets included here because it is the first Simpson episodeand it is a Christmas special. It is the first epidsode of a series going on 20+ years now -- which has to be some kind of record, animated series or no. It is also a Christmas special that is just a bit different than the norm: when Homer finds himself without money to buy the family gifts for Christmas he takes a part time job to get the money. When THAT doesn’t work out well he is convinced to use the little money he made at the dog track. Hearing the name of a late entry as Santa’s Little Helper, Homer is convinced that this is the miracle that will save the Simpsons Christmas. Of course, it's not. In the end it’s a simple gift of an adopted dog that makes for a special Christmas -- and a great introduction to the Simpson's on TV.

5. Frosty the Snowman

Why it is #5: Frosty the Snowman, animated with narration by Jimmy Durante, tells the story of the magic hat that brings Frosty to life and the magician who wants to steal the hat from him. In the end like any good special the magician changes his ways and Frosty goes to live at the North Pole with Santa so he does not melt. It is a simple, feel good story where everybody wins -- and it makes it feel like Christmas every year when it is shown.

6. The Year Without a Santa Claus

Why it is #6: Another classic Rankin/Bass stop motion special tells the story of a year when Santa Claus gets sick and is convinced there is not many people left in the world who believe in him. Santa decides to take a break from delivering presents. It is up to two little elves and a tiny reindeer to find people who still believe in Santa to get him to change his mind. Best known for the introduction of the characters Heat Miser and Snow Miser - and their classic conflict resolution with Mother Nature -- their catchy tunes teach non-holiday morals and in the process convey the Spirit of Christmas.

7. Mickey’s Christmas Carol

Why it is #7: A short animated tale (tail?) that retells Dicken's A Christmas Carol with Disney characters (Scrooge McDuck). Utilizing the same formula that made Charlie Brown's Christmas #1 the tale-within-the-tale introduces the lessons of Dickens to a young audience while charming adults who love both the story -- and Disney.

8. Santa Claus is Coming to Town

Why it is #8: Another Rankin/Bass special, it tells the story of Santa from the time he was a little orphan baby until he moves to the North Pole. Along the way he meets his future bride, an evil warlock (who becomes his friend), and a strange little penguin -- all to classic, memorable tunes. An odd story told by S.D. Kluger (Fred Astaire), it tells how Santa came to deliver toys to children and leave presents in their stockings -- a stark departure from the classic history of the modern Santa Claus that is nevertheless politically correct, secular and ever-so-child-and-family friendly.

9. Bob Hope’s Christmas Specials

Why it is #9: Ok, a bit of a cop out here as I am not selecting one special in particular but rather all of them. My reasoning? Well to be fair I haven’t seen all of them. I have however seen Hope for the Holidays, which is a Christmas best of special with bits from all of his specials including visits with the troops and even some skits thrown in. If I could get my hands on all these specials I’m sure I would be hard pressed to pick a favorite. These make my list because they are timeless in their humor and real in their perspective -- something the classic animated and stop motion specials lack.

10. Happy Holidays with Bing & Frank

Why it is #10: Despite the title this is actually a Frank Sinatra special with Bing Crosby as his guest. I picked this as #10 for the simple reason that it features two of the best singers of all time performer some of the best of all-time Christmas music. It never grows old -- and it doesn't get better than that.

MMC Editor

2011-12-22T06:14:00.002-08:00

Black Friday in a down economy should spell a total win for Christmas shoppers. Indeed, word on the street is that the deals will be fast and furious this year. While these aren't our final Black Friday prognostications we think the rumors about the following are solid and should be considered as you make your buying plans.

1. Smaller screen HDTVs will be dirt cheap. Isn't it funny what we consider small these days. Turn back the clock 20 years and a 25-inch tube television was the hottest "big screen" on the market. Now flat panels in all their varieties are the standard and the smaller sizes are 32" and 42". Is this a great country or what?

But wait -- it gets better. How would you like to get that 32" HDTV for less than $200. Chances are that is going to happen this Black Friday -- the price on these have dropped 50% in the past two holiday seasons. Deals will abound in this category.

2. Tablets will be hot....(which means #3 below is the real deal this season)...Amazon's Kindle Fire just ignited the tablet category into something exciting. Priced at $199 ($300 below the cheapest iPad) you're going to see a lot of folks go for it. To be honest, these are two very different products and they will both sell very well.

3. Laptops in the 15-inch and 17-inch variety are going to be cheap. Very cheap. Tablets are the hot thing and laptops are suddenly old school. Of course, if you actually want to get work done while on the road versus merely being entertained and looking cool a laptop is the way to go. And a laptop is an indispensible tool for students. This year they will stack-'em-deep-and-sell-'em-cheap -- starting at $199 for laptops that just a few years ago topped out at over $1000.

4. The two big trends in "Black Friday" bargains actually don't have anything to do with any particular product. Those trends are "earlier than ever" -- meaning that the day after Thanksgiving thing might not be the big event it once was. And the other is "get it online". Stores stockpile and staff stores, greatly cutting into profit. What if they can sell those bargains at a reduced cost? What if they offer the deals earlier, online and with free-shipping? That would allow more retailers to get earlier holiday dollars -- and shoppers to spread out their buying. Retailers to watch in this regard? Amazon, Wal Mart, and Best Buy.

5. Low-Tech stuff is plentiful -- and cheap. Look for great discounts on small appliances, home office equipment, apparel and toys. These don't carry the headlines traditionally on Black Friday but they should. In a down economy a $25 coat at Sears for your kid is a bargain for a necessity. These deals will be plentiful.

6. Remember when the Wii was $300? No more. It's been five years since a new system was introduced and there are new technologies on the horizon -- but not for this Christmas. You'll see the Wii for $99.

There are two things to remember whether you are a shopper or a retailer this holiday season: none of the economic indicators are pointing up. That means retailers are already forecasting this to be a down season.

That's good news for consumers, right?

Wrong. Retailers are going to cut their losses early. That means deals early -- and not much going on from Thanksgiving weekend forward. Like we saw during Christmas 2008 and 2009 selection will be limited the closer we get to Christmas and prices aren't going to change much after Thanksgiving weekend.

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The Worst (and Best) War-on-Xmas News of 2011

2011-12-22T06:14:00.001-08:00

The Worst (and Best) War-on-Xmas News of 2011

—By Asawin Suebsaeng

| Thu Dec. 22, 2011 2:30 AM PST

Steven Perez /Flickr

It's been a frustrating, gruelingly partisan, and very weird year in America. Pizza slingerextraordinaire Herman Cain actually rose to the top of the 2012 Republican presidential crop. The Obama administration felt compelled to assure us that war with alien life forms is not imminent. People freaked out over bestiality in the military. And let's not forget that Rocky is now being turned into a damn musical.

Surely, this holiday season is set to offer some semblance of calm and harmony, right? A few moments free from the year's deluge of political cheap shots and cultural mayhem?

Not on your life.

Here's a round-up of the 2011 Christmas season's strangest (and most painfully delightful) news stories, including the Michigan-Wisconsin mitten war and Santa Claus' machine-gun-fest for kids.

1. Conservatives Wage War on Obama's War on Christmas Trees

The narrative went something like this: Economic times are tough. Americans deserve a break during the holidays. Americans also deserve affordable prices on their Christmas trees. But the Obama administration is trying to slap on a new tax—on Christmas trees! Huh. Obama must really hate Christians, then. And Jesus. And America, too. Typical Kenyan Muslim. Aghghghahagh!!!

Cue Heritage Foundation blogger—and former legal counsel to Dick Cheney—David Addington , who posted in early November:

Just because the Obama Administration has the legal power to impose its Christmas Tree Tax doesn't mean it should do so.
The economy is barely growing and nine percent of the American people have no jobs. Is a new tax on Christmas trees the best President Obama can do?"

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Basically, this is the Jesus-Bday version of the $16 muffin: Beyond the phony outrage and some mangled facts, move along people, cause there's no reason for indignation here. The plan for the grossly misunderstood 15-cent fee came fully endorsed by the National Christmas Tree Association and was originally devised by tree retailers and tree farmersbefore the president took office. So if the White House really is prosecuting a War on Christmas, brandishing the Internal Revenue Service as its weapon of choice, then this covert op was hatched under George W. Bush.

Here's John King 's takedown of the manufactured outcry:

2. Santa's Wondrous Machine-Gun Club for Tots

ChristmasNothing says Christmas like a small child brandishing a gas-operated semi-automatic weapon. ThinkProgresspicked up the story:

[T]his year, it's gun rights advocates who are offering the most twisted take on a Christmas tradition. Fox 5 News [in Phoenix, AZ] reports that the Scottsdale Gun Club is inviting people to enjoy "Santa and Machine Guns" — a "family event" that lets kids take a holiday card picture with St. Nick and an assortment of high-powered fire arms. Families can choose from pistols, modified AR15's, an $80,000 Garwood minigun and more. More disturbingly, they're encouraged to test out the machine guns. Video and pictures from the event show that young children often wield weapons larger than they are.

The Fox 5 report quotes club member Richard Jones, who insists that "[w]hether you're a gun advocate or not, you should have a lot of fun with it."

Am I the only one who thinks that this will predispose these children to mature into a bunch ofBad Santa s?

3. The Epic "Mitten-State" Turf War of December 2011

There was a time when I considered this to be the greatest use of AP column space ever. I stand corrected :

Michigan and Wisconsin have thrown off the gloves in a hand-to-hand combat over which of them looks more like a mitten.

"Hey, Wisconsin, get real!! The Mitten is ours!!" tweeted one Michigan resident upset the state across Lake Michigan is trying to usurp a shape so iconic it can be picked out by orbiting spaceships. Noted another, "Only one state has Mitten Mojo!"
Alex Beaton of the Awesome Mitten website spotted the knit mitten shaped like Wisconsin on the Travel Wisconsin website this week and kicked off the bare-knuckled offensive against what she saw as a mitten impostor.Only one state can be the mitten-est.
"People in Michigan, we do identify ourselves so closely with the Mitten State," Beaton said of the state's Lower Peninsula. "We're America's high five!"

The AP story—cutely titled "Michigan gives thumbs-down to Wisconsin mitten campaign"—coincided splendidly with the mitten-ready winter holiday. It goes on to describe the efforts of Wisconsinite Tom Lyons, who insists that "Wisconsin is the left mitten. Michigan is the right mitten. Even children know that one mitten doesn't cut it when it comes to Midwest winters." Lyons claims that (no joke, I think...) "he often holds up his left hand when locating state places for others."

I'm holding out for a Michigan State Braveheart remix , as long as it includes the line, "They may take our lives, but they'll never co-opt OUR MeeeeeeEEETTTENSssssSSS!!!!"

4. Canadian Anti-Globalization Leftists Want Us to Occupy Gift-Getting?

Um, how 'bout no :

You've been sleeping on the streets for two months pleading peacefully for a new spirit in economics. And just as your camps are raided, your eyes pepper sprayed and your head's knocked in, another group of people are preparing to camp-out. Only these people aren't here to support occupy Wall Street, they're here to secure their spot in line for a Black Friday bargain at Super Target and Macy's.
Occupy gave the world a new way of thinking about the fat cats and financial pirates on Wall Street. Now lets give them a new way of thinking about the holidays, about our own consumption habits...[Let's] launch an all-out offensive to unseat the corporate kings on the holiday throne. This year's Black Friday will be the first campaign of the holiday season where we set the tone for a new type of holiday culminating with #OCCUPYXMAS.

That was from Vancouver's Adbusters, the editorial crew that helped kick off Occupy Wall Street. The phase #OCCUPYXMAS was scheduled for November 25-26, along with "consumer fasts," "Santa sit-ins ," flash mobs, and a general huge inconvenience to holiday shoppers and check-out lines. Predictably, the effort to #OccupyXmasPresentsThatKeepMyChildrenSanedidn't have an impressive turnout . This clip (and a crop of others) illustrates why:

5. Santa Claus Dangles From a Mall Rooftop, Traumatizes The Children

This story about a rent-a-Santa in Florida might very well top the list of "things that weren't in the job description." Here's some background from the Daily Mail on an incident that took place in late November:

A man dressed as jolly old St Nicholas was supposed to make a grand entrance at a mall in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida. Instead, he managed to get his beard tangled in the rope, losing the beard—and his hat—entirely. It was trouble from the get-go when Santa hesitated and fumbled before clumsily going over the ledge.
An elven helper tried to get him off to a good start. What followed was nearly three minutes of Santa—still suspended in mid-air—trying to descend down to the stage after his beard got tangled in the rappelling equipment. The elf looked on, helpless at Santa's plight. A lone child hopefully cried out: "Santa!" Two announcers commenting on the event didn't help the awkward entrance.
"Everybody cheer, everybody cheer Santa on!" the female announcer said to the crowd. "I think if you guys sing nice and loud, you can help Santa come down!" She also told the horrified children: "Magic can happen!" She encouraged children to sing along with a rendition of "We Wish You a Merry Christmas."

Enough talk; sit back and watch the holiday awfulness unfold:

6. Norway's Butter Emergency

Europe has a lot on its plate: There's the euro crisis with its massive international implications. The whole Putin/voter-fraud thing . And the James Murdoch affair is bubbling up, yet again.

But the worst of the lot? I'm going with the Norwegian butter catastrophe. AFP reported early last week :

An acute butter shortage in Norway, one of the world's richest countries, has left people worrying how to bake their Christmas goodies with store shelves emptied and prices through the roof.
The shortfall, expected to last into January, amounts to between 500 and 1,000 tonnes, said Tine, Norway's main dairy company, while online sellers have offered 500-gramme packs for up to 350 euros ($465). The dire shortage poses a serious challenge for Norwegians who are trying to finish their traditional Christmas baking -- a task which usually requires them to make at least seven different kinds of biscuits.
The shortfall has been blamed on a rainy summer that cut into feed production and therefore dairy output, but also the ballooning popularity of a low-carbohydrate, fat-rich diet that has sent demand for butter soaring. "Compared to 2010, demand has grown by as much as 30 percent," Tine spokesman Lars Galtung told AFP. Last Friday, customs officers stopped a Russian at the Norwegian-Swedish border and seized 90 kilos (198 pounds) of butter stashed in his car.

Quick, mobilize the large-scale international aid effort! Get Sean Penn to host the telethon! The Norwegians require seven different kinds of pillowy biscuits, people. Not six, not five, and never—shuddder—four. Seven!

7. The Mailman Wants To Kill Christmas, Too??

Grinch, 2.0Yes, it does seem to be the case, according to the good folks at the Family Research Council . On December 14, the office of FRC president Tony Perkins blasted out the following press release:

Last Saturday, FRC's own J.P. Duffy was waiting in line with his family at a Maryland post office when three Christmas carolers entered to sing for the longsuffering customers.
The carolers were quickly silenced, however, by an angry postal manager who instructed them to immediately leave the premises, citing that they were in violation of a "no-solicitation policy." Despite jeers from the postal patrons, the manager never relented, causing the carolers to take their cheer elsewhere.
Fox News reporter Todd Starnes followed up on the story and received confirmation that the United States Postal Service does indeed ban Christmas carolers. Such a ban on Christmas caroling is antagonistic toward the long-held Christmas traditions of the American people, and is an unnecessary affront to patrons who use the post office daily to send Christmas cards and packages.
U.S. Rep. Doug Lamborn, (R-CO), has introduced a resolution (H. Res. 489) that recognizes the importance of the symbols and traditions of Christmas, strongly disapproves of attempts to ban references to Christmas; and expresses support for the use of these symbols and traditions by those who celebrate Christmas.

H. Res. 489, introduced earlier this month, currently has 54 co-sponsors , including Rep. Spencer Bachus (R-AL) and just two House Dems. Mind-numbing culture war FTW !

8. Rick Perry Really Does Make This Too Easy

By now, you might have heard that this campaign ad has attracted more Internet hateration than your average Justin Bieber YouTube video . The resulting meme is totally well-deserved:

I'm not ashamed to admit that I'm a Christian. But you don't need to be in the pew every Sunday to know that there's something wrong in this country when gays can serve openly in the military but our kids can't openly celebrate Christmas or pray in school. As president, I'll end Obama's war on religion and I'll fight against liberal attacks on our religious heritage.

As our own Tim Murphy puts it: "What is this war on religion, anyway? Did Congress authorize it? How is it being paid for? If Rick Perry is a Christian and President Obama is at war with Christians, can Obama detain Perry indefinitely without trial?"